What If We Don’t Want a Traditional Baby Funeral?

When a baby or child dies, families can suddenly find themselves navigating conversations about cremation, burial, coffins, ceremonies, cemeteries and paperwork, often while trying to make sense of an unimaginable loss.

And somewhere amongst all of this, you might quietly wonder, do we actually have to do it this way?

No.

A farewell can be quiet

It might be only a handful of people.

There may be no formal service, no large gathering and no expectation that anyone stands at the front of a room and speaks.

It might simply be parents, siblings or grandparents spending time together.

A candle.A song.A blanket.A few photographs.

Sometimes the most meaningful farewell is also the smallest.

It can be a vigil

Some families want time rather than ceremony.

A vigil can create space to simply be with your baby before cremation or burial.

You might hold them, talk to them, read a letter, take photographs or invite grandparents and siblings to spend time with them.

You might sit quietly and do nothing at all.

There is no requirement for a farewell to be filled with words.

It can be personal

A baby funeral can include the things that matter to your family.

A favourite blanket. A tiny pair of shoes. A photograph from pregnancy. A letter from a sibling. A teddy bear. A flower. A song. A name.

The things included in a farewell don't need to be grand. They simply need to mean something to you.

You can choose what feels right

Some families choose a private cremation. Others want time with their baby before cremation, followed by an intimate farewell.

Some want a traditional funeral service. Others want something much simpler.

Some families want everyone there. Others want only the people closest to them.

And some don't know what they want yet.

Not knowing is okay.

You don't have to arrive at your first conversation with a funeral director knowing every answer. Part of our role is to explain what is possible, answer your questions and give you the information you need to make decisions when you're ready.

At Ever May, our role is not to tell you how you should grieve or what your baby's funeral should look like. Our role is to listen, explain, offer choices and help you create something meaningful.

We provide dedicated baby and children's funeral care across Melbourne, Ballarat, Daylesford and regional Victoria.

Because there is no single right way to welcome a baby.

And there is no single right way to say goodbye.

There is only your way.